Plumbing Jobs 101

People talk about “plumber’s rates,” bemoaning the fact that they make far less. Is that true? Even if it were, would you want this job. It is lucrative, especially if you are self-employed, and your time is your own. So let’s look at a day in the life of a plumber at work.

Seven: up and at ‘em early at six, you are ready to roll. Your first appointment beckons. The man works so you have to get there “on the nose” according to his phone message, “otherwise I am gone.”

Eight: one job under your belt you are in the car stuck on the freeway to your next appointment. You call to warn them courteously that you will be five minutes late. They are irate and screaming that their kitchen sink is overflowing onto the floor and they are hysterical.

Nine: you fixed a faulty faucet, made a few quick bucks and are at the front door of a mansion. Looks good. You go in to find that the lady of the house is disdainful of your dirty shoes. You remove them and proceed to fix the broken toilet. The lady has the housekeeper keep an eye on you lest you touch anything at all.

Ten: a quick cup of coffee and you are on the road again stuck in traffic. You call the irate customer so warn them you will be a teeny bit late, but they say “get here now.”

Eleven: the jobs are easy enough but your nerves are getting frayed. The next job is a hot water heater on the fritz. You check out the connections and find out that the kids have pulled the plug on their high end tankless water heater as a prank. The homeowner refuses to pay for “no work” and circumvents your explanation of a house call.

Noon: you need another cup of coffee and an aspirin. No time for lunch.

One: You are on the road again stuck in traffic but this time you will arrive as scheduled. The client is not particularly appreciative. You fix another broken hot water heater. What? Is there an epidemic going on?

Two: Thank goodness the next job is in the neighborhood. Maybe this time you can be efficient and make some real money. You unplug a stopped up toilet. Anyone could do it with a plunger. The owner says she will pay only half the house call fee.

Three: you need another aspirin and a nap. But no time. You are on the road again and stuck in traffic. You do not make the appointment and get yelled at for five minutes straight.

Four: the ten o’clock appointment called to say she forgot to tell you about another leak so you hightail it to get there, hoping to score some bucks.

Five: you finish the four o’clock call and check your messages. Yup, the usual “emergency” and you agree to get back on that nasty clogged like a bad drain pipe freeway.

Six: you arrive at your final appointment and pretend to be in a good mood. You are not. But the lady of the house is attractive so you don’t mind the job, whatever it is.